The Secretest Santa
by Nintendo Nut1
Summary: It's Christmas time again. Many Smashers decide to participate in Secret Santa to ring in the holiday spirit, and who knows? Maybe a nonbeliever will finally understand the true meaning of Christmas!
1. Christmas Blues

A/N: Okay, time for a holiday fic again! I'm sure you'll enjoy this much better than my last Halloween fic, I promise.

Crash: (is hanging Christmas lights) Fa la la la la la la la la…

Oh, yeah, he's my guest helper for this fic. Say hi, Crash!

Crash: Hey, guys!! WAAAHHH!!! (falls off the ladder)

XD Here's the first chappie!! WOO!! MY FIRST UPDATE IN AGES!!! :D

The Secretest Santa: Chapter 1: Christmas Blues

A chilly, winter wind greeted the evening air. Tiny snowflakes floated elegantly to the ground, covering the ground in a white blanket of fresh, powdered snow. The December evening gave the perfect holiday feel- That is, if you believe in the Holidays.

Link sure didn't.

The Hylian leaned on the couch, looking out the window at the gray and white atmosphere, sighing deeply. It was currently Winter Break at the SSBM Mansion, and the arenas were all closed as long as the break went on. Most Smashers were preparing for Christmas Day and the new year, but not Link.

Now, it wasn't because he was cold or anything. He just believed that Christmas was all about greed. Everyone demands presents, presents, presents. So much money is spent this time of year, just in silly decorations alone. Link noticed this fact as well as he looked around the lounge ruefully.

It was like Christmas threw up in there; tinsel covered where the walls met the ceiling, and there were at least three wreaths on every wall. The rest of the wall space held posters with Santa or reindeers and had messages along the lines of "Merry Christmas!" and "Happy Holidays!" And worst of all, a small, plastic snowman hung on the door leading to the dorms, and every time the door was opened, it would play "We Wish You a Merry Christmas." Link would rather walk all the way around the Mansion to find a different way into the dorms then even go near that door.

He looked back out the window again and noticed yet another inch was added onto the flat pile of puffy, white snow. He sighed once again. No, Christmas was not a joyful time for him, and he had no clue how everyone else thought it was so great.

Suddenly, his sharp ears caught grunts and thuds outside the door opposite of the dreaded Snowman door, leading out into the Foyer of the Mansion. The door clicked open, and a white-gloved hand was grasped the doorknob, slowly pushing it open. Slowly, because the other hand was occupied along with other hands. The first thing that poked out from the doorway was the point of a pine tree, glistened with icy frost. Soon, as it appeared more clearly, Link could tell it was being carried by Mario, Peach, Fox, and Roy with painstaking care.

"Okay, keep going, keep going…" Mario, getting a backwards glimpse into the room, instructed wearily.

The feet below the rustling pine leaves shuffled across the floor as they carefully approached an empty corner.

"My arms are going numb…" Roy complained.

"Almost, guys, almost…" They got in position. "…Now!"

They carefully placed the pot that held it on the floor and tilted the tree until it stood upright in all its glory. The four backed off, looking it over.

"See, Fox?" Roy exclaimed. "I TOLD you it would fit!"

"Huh," Fox looked it up and down carefully. "Guess I measured wrong…"

"It's so pretty!" Peach squealed softly in delight.

"And at a good price, too," Mario added, nodding.

Link rolled his eyes and looked back out the window, even though it was covered in frost.

"Well, look who it is," Roy must've noticed him, but Link didn't turn. "Ol' Gloomy Guts!"

"Shut up."

Peach placed her hands on her hips. "Y'know, Link, you could be a little more cheerful during the holidays!"

"Who says?" His uninterested tone didn't waiver.

"Hey, you're as energetic as Roy any other time of the year!" Fox reasoned, pointing a thumb at Roy.

"Yeah, you're no fun during Christmas!"

Link quickly stood, shooting then a dirty look. "Look, I just don't like Christmas, okay!?"

"Link…" But Mario couldn't finish as the door slammed and "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" broke the awkward silence.

"What a scrooge," Peach scoffed.

Mario shook his head in dismay.

----------

Link flopped onto his bed in frustration. He sighed deeply, twirling the corner of his pillow with his fingers. They wouldn't understand, they're already been brainwashed by the commercial media, blowing their money on Christmas decorations and the sort. It was hopeless to try and reason with them.

Suddenly, the door creaked open and soft footsteps entered the room. That's not what surprised Link, but it was a soft little Christmas song. He quickly sat up and stared at the new figure.

"…the heck is that!?"

"They hung a musical reindeer on your door," Marth instantly answered.

"Ugh, turn it off!!" Link groaned, burying his face in his pillow lazily.

Understanding, Marth turned a little knob, and the beeping little song stopped. He looked at the frustrated Link in slight concern. Marth was his closest friend in SSBM, no matter how the Hylian acted, for Marth was easily forgiving. Marth knew Link wouldn't be so unpleasant unless agitated by others, and that generally was the case this time of year. Knowing this, Marth sat on the bed by Link.

"Roy told me you were being unpleasant again…" Marth started.

"I didn't start it…" came a muffled grunt.

"I know you didn't," Marth reasoned. "Roy can get hot-headed when annoyed."

Link didn't respond, staring at a piece of lint on the carpet.

"Link… I need to ask you something."

"…What?"

Marth sighed. "Why DON'T you like Christmas, anyway?"

Link shot Marth a look that made him regret asking, but after a moment of thought it softened, and he said quietly, "You won't… tell anyone?"

"My lips are sealed."

Sighing, Link turned over, facing the plain, gray ceiling. "All it's about is greed. Everyone wants presents and spends money on anything. It's just… insane!"

"Hmm," Marth sighed, swinging his feet back and forth lightly. "Didn't know you thought about it that way…"

"Well, anyway, I don't want to talk about it," Link reached over and grabbed his CD player, placing the headphones on his ears.

"Link…" But the elf couldn't hear Marth as the music turned out his voice. Marth sighed and got up, leaving the room. He glanced back at Link ruefully before closing the door.

A/N: So? How is it so far? Let me know, please!

Crash: That Link's a scrooge!! He better learn his lesson soon!

Don't worry, he shall. YAY!!! MY COMPUTER'S FIXED!! Review people!


	2. Secret Santa

A/N: You like so far? Good! Cause here's the next chappie!

Crash: Right on! (hanging up stockings)

Uh… Crash, careful with that hammer…

Crash: (slams it into his finger) OOOOOWWWWWW!!!! (dancing in circles, holding his thumb in pain)

XD Here's the chappie!

The Secretest Santa: Chapter 2: Secret Santa

_Bong bing bong_… the intercom chimed.

"Hey, Smashers! Report to the lounge immediately. No one's in trouble, just come please." Mario's voice echoed across the mansion.

It was the next morning, and this message was given out right after breakfast. The Smashers obeyed and headed towards the lounge, curious as to what was up. When they settled in chairs, sofas, or carpets, Mario stood, leaning on a table holding a small basket, decorated with red and green ribbons, of course.

"Thanks for coming," Mario started, and those three words started a cyclone of questions and comments.

"What's going on?"

"What's with the basket?"

"Ooh, the tree looks pretty!"

"Who's gonna brew the eggnog today?"

"I gotta go pee…"

"Hey, people, shaddap!" Mario shouted, and everyone went quiet. Sighing, he continued. "It's come to my attention that some people here are lacking the Christmas spirit." He eyed a few people, namely Link. "So I got together with others to create an activity we will _all_ participate in."

Many cheery voices piped up in acceptance, along with a few groans of annoyance.

Mario ignored the groans and held up the basket. "Most of you have heard of 'Secret Santa.' I've put the names of all 26 of us in this basket. Each of us will pick out a random name and you must find a gift for the person you selected. Let's start…"

He went around the room, holding the basket while each Smasher shuffled their fingers through the slips of paper inside without looking, finally selecting a piece of paper each.

"Remember," Mario added. "No telling anybody else. Keep your names secret. That's the point, after all!"

As Mario cycled through the room, Link desperately hid between Marth and Zelda, hoping he'd be skipped. He looked down at a slowly approaching Mario, growing nervous.

_Don't let him see me, Don't let him see me, Don't let him see me…! _He silently begged as he closed his eyes tightly, wishing he was invisible.

_Don't let him see…_

"Link, it's your turn!"

_Crap!_

Link hid his panic under a slight scowl, reaching into the basket. There were few slips left, so he snagged one quickly so Mario could move on and give someone else that cheerful smile. Link glared at the back of Mario's head, then looked down at the single word on the slip of paper.

Roy.

Link groaned quietly and rolled his eyes. Of course, he just HAD to pick out "Mr. Fun."

Soon, Mario set the empty basket back on the table, and everyone, including himself, had a person. Mixed expressions were on their faces.

"So," Mario grinned. "Everybody's got a person?"

They all nodded at different rates.

"Great! We've all got a week to get gifts till Christmas Day! Good luck!"

The big group broke off, chatting softly and "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" played as the dorm door constantly opened. Marth watched as Link left through the lobby door, and followed him. He caught up with the Hylian and strolled beside him.

"So…" Marth started. "Who'd you get? I won't tell."

Link sighed. "Roy."

Marth couldn't help but chuckle. "Oh, boy! You're in a fix!"

Link gave him a dark scowl. "That doesn't help," he growled darkly.

"Sorry," Marth apologized. "I'm gonna head to the mall tonight to look for Bowser's gift ahead of time."

Link threw Marth a semi-shocked look. "You got Bowser? You're joking, right?"

Marth shook his head. "I know it seems silly, but Bowser deserves a gift, no matter who he is. Anyway, you wanna come with?"

"Eh…" Link shrugged, not caring that much.

"Hey, the sooner you get it, the better. You procrastinate, and there won't be anything left in the stores, and Roy will be even more pissed at you."

Link sighed. No matter how annoying Roy was, he was still a friend, he had to admit that. And he had few friends to begin with…

"Fine, I'll come," Link responded. "As long as you make sure I'm not seen."

Marth chuckled. "Whatever you say. Lemme just grab my jacket and we'll go!"

Link watched him go, approaching his own dorm for his own jacket. The sooner he got this crap over with, the better.

A/N: (wrapping up Crash's thumb) Oh, hey, guys! You like the chapter?

Crash: (whimpering) It hurts…

Then watch where you put your hammer next time.

Crash: (sniff) Alright…

(hugs him for comfort) Review, people!


	3. To the Mall!

A/N: Hello. Sorry bout the insufficient lack of updates. The virus hasn't been killed yet, so yeah…

Crash: Darn… (all of the darn sudden, Dr. Cortex falls out of the sky and lands on top of him) OW!!!

O.o Wow, that was quite random. Hey, Cortex. Welcome to the fic.

Cortex: Ooh, me head…

Crash: (in pain) Your elbow… (cough) is in a very bad place right now…

Cortex: (gets up) Sorry!

XD Here's the chappie.

The Secretest Santa: Chapter 3: To the Mall!

The two swordsmen strolled around in the snow, their thick boots crunching in the powdered ice. The flow of snowflakes had ended, only to start again the next evening. The gray, morning environment greeted the two with a chilly breeze.

Marth wore a simple, leather jacket over his clothes, whereas Link wore a fleece jacket with furry cuffs and collars. A hood fell back over his shoulders.

"There it is," said Marth, a puff of warm breath flowing through the cold air. "The mall's up ahead."

With that, Link silently pulled the hood over his head, mostly covering his features. "Let's go."

They stepped casually into the mall. It was thankfully a warm, indoors mall with two levels and over 80 stores and counting with the wing being built. Many pairs of feet walked on the polished tile floor, with the building filled with all the hustle and bustle one would expect this time of year. Christmas lights and ornaments hung from the high ceiling.

The two walked slowly by the shops, looking around. Marth already knew where he needed to go, so Link just followed, window shopping with little interest. They passed by toy shops, with random toys ranging from wooden dolls to remote-controlled cars. There were also clothes shops, hardware stores with tools hanging on the shelves, and many others. Suddenly, one window caught Link's attention, and he stopped his stroll, staring into the window of the Ancient Blades Shoppe.

"Hmm?" Marth stopped, looking at Link oddly. "You find something?"

Link didn't respond, looking at one knife in particular. The hilt was decorated with forest-type carvings, a steel handle in a deep green color. The blade itself was stainless steel, shaped to look like a leaf. Its matching sheath sat next to it, and both gleamed in the light. Link pressed his hands against the glass and stared at it like a child stares into a candy store.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" said Link, not fully aware he was speaking out loud. "If I bought it, I'd dub it Razorleaf…"

Marth smiled. "Well, well, seems like even you have your own Christmas wishes."

Coming back to himself, Link straightened up. "What are talking about? I've wanted that knife for quite a while now!"

"Well, who knows? Maybe your Secret Santa will get it for you."

Link didn't respond at first, stepping away from the window. Then he decided to change the subject. "You think I'll find anything for Roy in here?"

"Nah, he's got enough swords," Marth answered.

"What DOES he like, anyway?" Link asked as they continued their stroll.

"Mostly music. You can get him a CD or something, and he'll be happy."

"Okay." Link didn't think it was going to be so easy, but only minutes into this place, he already knew what to buy. Glancing back into the Ancient Blades window briefly, they continued.

They reached the Electronics store, the kind that sold both movies and CDs. Upbeat music played in the background.

"Well, I'm gonna go look around," said Marth. "Meet you at the counter."

Link nodded, and the two split up in their separate aisles in the music section. As Link searched around the Rock section for a certain CD, he didn't look up until someone bumped into him.

"Hey, HEY!! Watch it, punk!"

"Sorry," Link automatically apologized, but soon recognized the snarling voice, and looked up. "Bowser…?"

Bowser looked up at Link with a contorted look. "Link? That you?"

Link sighed. "Yeah."

"Heh. Funny seeing you here," the Koopa chuckled.

"I fail to see the humor in me being in an Electronics store," Link retorted, facing the CD rack.

"Oh, I get it. Getting the present to get it over with?"

"Yeah…" Link sighed. Bowser read him like a book.

"Eh, me too," Bowser faced the rack himself. "This whole 'Secret Santa' thing is a load of bologna if you ask me."

"Hey, it's an honest effort to get some Christmas spirit into the Mansion," Link admitted. "An unnecessary effort, but an effort nonetheless."

"Hehe," Bowser made that same chuckle. When the two selected their gifts, they approached the counter. As Link waited for Marth patiently, Bowser caught the sight of a certain shelf and gasped in delight. Out of curiosity, Link followed the excited Koopa King and looked at the contents on the shelf.

"'The Special Edition Scary Movie Trilogy on DVD,'" Link read out-loud, then shot Bowser a skeptical look.

"Hey, come on!" Bowser shouted. "This series is friggen' funny! And I want the box set, but it's so expensive!"

"Why not just buy the three movies separately?" Link suggested.

"But you don't get the special stuff!" Bowser wailed.

Link sighed and shook his head, thinking the Koopa was crazy, until a thought crossed his mind: _I wonder how he'd feel if I bought for him…_

He then shook his head subconsciously. _Have **I** gone crazy?_

"There you are, Link," Marth's voice interrupted his thoughts, and he faced his friend with a slight grin. "You ready?"

Link nodded, leaving Bowser to swoon over the movie shelf.

The two paid for their gifts and left, heading for the exit they had previously entered the mall from. But on their way there, Link froze in his tracks again, this time looking into a Woman's Boutique Store.

"What'd you find now?" Marth asked.

Link entered the store, looking at one certain dress. It was a plum purple halter-top, with sparkling pink, Chinese-style flowers. Link grasped it softly, running his fingers through the silky fabric.

Marth managed a small grin. "Well, this is a shocker. Although, I expected someone like you'd be interested in dresses."

Link gave his friend a glare. "Har, har," he responded, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Marth chuckled. "No, but seriously, that's a nice dress."

Link nodded slowly, glancing back down at it. "…Zelda's wanted this dress for the longest time… Every time we pass by this store, she'd always swoon over it… But she never had the time to actually get it…"

Marth bit his lower lip in thought, glancing back and forth between the dress and his suddenly quiet friend.

Finally, Link told Marth, "Wait outside the store. I'll be right back." And he grabbed the dress gently and rushed inside.

Marth watched him go with a smile and leaned against the wall, whistling to himself.

Feeling quite ridiculous in his current situation, Link frantically searched for an open counter, and found one at the back of the store, run by what appeared to be a no-nonsense woman. He rushed up before anyone else could.

"Excuse me," he said breathlessly, placing the dress on the countertop. "Is there any way you can reserve this for me?"

The woman raised a brow.

"B-because I really need to get this for someone, I can bring in the money tomorrow…"

"Uh-huh." The woman crossed her arms. "Listen, kid, everyone's in the Christmas chase, and if you can't get something, well, that's just too bad," she grumbled without emotion.

Link sighed, trying to think quickly of an excuse. He found one, and though his conscious told him no, absolutely not, he brushed it away and began playacting.

"Listen…" he sighed softly, acting upset. "The girl who this dress is for… s-she's very ill…"

The woman slowly softened her look. "Oh, she is?"

"Yeah… She's got… cancer…" he blurted out, feeling horrible of himself.

The woman suddenly charged her attitude into a sympathetic one. "Oh, how dreadful! I lost a husband to that! The poor girl…"

"Yeah, and she's only got, like, a few months at the most left, and I'm trying to make her last months the happiest, you know?" The woman nodded, and he continued. "And she's really wanted this dress for a long time…"

The woman thought for a moment, then a smile broke over her face like a wave. "Tell you what. I'll keep it aside for you, and if you can show up before noon tomorrow, it's all yours."

Link nodded. "Yeah, I can do that."

"Alright, then." She put it under the counter. "See you tomorrow, then."

Relived, he nodded. "Thank you so much, ma'am." And he rushed out, meeting Marth outside.

Marth looked him up and down as they started their stroll. "So, what happened to the dress?"

"None of your business," Link replied quickly.

"Oh, come on," Marth persisted. "What'd you do with it?"

"Dang it, Marth, it's not your business! Back off!" Link snapped, receiving a shocked look from his friend. Realizing what he said, Link briefly turned away in shame.

"I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have snapped like that…" he quickly apologized, but turned when Marth placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, it's alright," Marth smiled, ever forgiving. "I should've known better than to try and squeeze a secret out of you!" he chuckled.

Link smiled softly, nodding.

"Let's head out," suggested Marth. "If we can hurry, we can get back to the Mansion before the evening blizzards start."

Link nodded in agreement, walking beside his friend as they stepped out into the snow once more. Small snowflakes were already falling as they returned to the Mansion.

A/N: Okay, I should note that there will be many things that I mention in this fic, but don't own. Yeah, you'll notice them. And I'm so sorry to those people who are sensitive to the subject of cancer. No hard feelings…

Cortex: What on earth am I doing here?

You dropped out of the sky randomly at the request of one of our reviewers. Now you're in for the rest of the fic!

Cortex: I am!?

Crash: YAY!!! (hugs Cortex)

Cortex: O.O AAH!!! BANDICOOT GERMS!!!!

XDD Review, people!


	4. The Wish List

A/N: Aw, yeah! Time to get rolling!! If I make good timing, I'll be able to finish this before the month's over!!

Crash: YAY! Didya hear that, Cortex?

Cortex: Yes, and the sooner this is done, the better…

Hey, cheer up, Cortex!

Crash: Yeah! (starts bonking him with a stick) CHEER UP NOW!!!

Cortex: OW OW OW OW…!!!

XD Here's the chappie!

The Secretest Santa: Chapter 4: The Wish List

It was lunchtime by the time the two arrived. After removing their damp jackets and boots and hiding their gifts, Link and Marth joined their fellow Smashers in the cafeteria, helping themselves to whatever was being served. But Link avoided the eggnog.

He sat down by Zelda and quickly started on his warm beef stew. Zelda noticed his presence and smiled at her boyfriend.

"Hello, Link," she greeted, receiving a nod of greeting in return (his mouth was full of food). "Where've you been all day?"

Link swallowed. "Out."

"Out where?"

Marth sat on the other side of Link. "He went with me to the mall."

Hearing this, Roy, who was sitting across the table, grinned mischievously. "Wow, is Link already getting his Christmas shopping done??"

"Lay off," the elf grumbled.

"Don't get him mad, Roy," Zelda smirked. "You never know if he's your Secret Santa!"

"Yeah," Link grinned, catching on. "If I _was_ your Secret Santa, I could just as easily take the gift back!"

A look of shock and apprehension crossed Roy's face. "N-no way! Link can't be my Secret Santa!… Can he?"

Link smirked. "Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. You'll find out Christmas morning!"

Roy twitched, then groaned, "Aw, I hate it when you do that!"

Link went back to his food, savoring his private victory of striking fear into Roy. He was always fun to mess around with.

----------

Link left the cafeteria upon finishing his lunch, strolling towards his dorm by himself. Not really thinking about it, he entered the lounge and planned to enter through the Snowman-door. Why he decided this, he didn't know.

While passing by, Link looked up at the bulletin board, where the latest SSBM news was posted up for everyone to see. One piece of paper caught his eye. It was simply titled, "Wish List," and the names of each and every Smasher ran down the list with a few items by each of them. Link focused on one item for each name, slowly glancing down the list:

Mario- A new sport set- any sport, doesn't matter!

Pikachu- Warm clothes in my size

Bowser- The Special Edition Scary Movie Trilogy on DVD!!!

Peach- A warm, fuzzy robe

Yoshi- Bright colored markers for coloring

Donkey Kong- Donkey Konga game set

Captain Falcon- Model planes or cars

Fox- Any new book series- I want to try something new

Ness- Game Boy Advance SP

Popo & Nana- Summer clothes

Kirby- Anything involving food! )

Samus- Halo 2

Zelda- The halter-top dress at Woman's Boutique

Jigglypuff- Karaoke machine

Pichu- More neato accessories

Falco- Membership for the Laser Tag Arcade

Marth- A new CD player- my old one's broken

Young Link- More Yu-gi-oh cards

Ganondorf- ………

Mewtwo- Incense burner

Luigi- Encyclopedia of the Supernatural, Vol. 6

Roy- Electric guitar

Mr. Game and Watch- Any game with a collection of retro games

Link stared at the piece of paper in thought. Then, looking around to make sure no one else was around, he brought out a pen and a memo pad, and began to fiercely scribble down the list. When he was finished, he flipped the pad closed and proceeded through the dorm door in thought. "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" echoed through the room.

But this time, it didn't seem to bother him as much.

A/N: Wow, that chappie was short.

Cortex: I certainly hope all the chapters are like that… OW!!

Crash: (hefting his stick and grinning)

Yep, more copyrighted crap. Meh… -.-; Anyways, next chapter will be longer, promise.

Cortex: Darn… OWW!! WOULD YOU STOP THAT!?!?!

Crash: NO!! :)

Cortex: -.-;;; Curse my luck…

Review, peoples!


	5. Present Gathering

A/N: Alright, I gotta keep moving. If I'm persistent, I can finish this just in time for Christmas!!

Crash: Cool! (turns back to the wall) Now, watch Cortex, we hang the stocking like this…

Cortex: (shoots stocking with blaster, cause a bit of an explosion)

Crash: Oo (is all burnt)

Cortex: (chuckling) Whoops, my bad! I meant to put it on adhesive!

Crash: T.T;;

XD Chappie time!

The Secretest Santa: Chapter 5: Present Gathering

Link woke up early next morning. Quickly grabbing a latte and a croissant, he climbed into his car and drove off towards the mall. It seemed rather unnecessary, for the mall was quite close, but he knew he would need all the cargo space he could use in it.

Arriving early, he got a good parking space right by the entrance. He then leaped out of the car and prepared himself for an all-day shopping extravaganza.

Thankfully, the mall opened very early in the morning, and all the shops were open and at his disposal. But his first priority at the moment was over at the Woman's Boutique.

Link entered the store and made his way to the back counter. There was the same woman, and she was fast asleep. He smiled and cleared his throat loudly, waking her up.

"Oh… A bit early, aren't you?" she yawned.

Link looked up at the nearest clock. It read 6:45.

He grinned sheepishly at the woman. "Hehe… Wanted to get it as soon as possible!"

The woman smiled. "Well, alright, lemme get out your dress…" She looked below the counter, then gasped. "It's not here! Somebody moved it!"

Link's heart rose to his throat. "W-WHAT!?"

"The staff!" She snapped her fingers in realization. "They clean up the store every night during closing time! They must've found the dress and hung it back on the rack!"

Link immediately rushed back to the front of the store and quickly found the dress. But as he grabbed it, another hand grabbed it at the same time. A delicate, petite hand with bright red, glossy fingernails that looked as though they were pasted on.

Link looked up and identified his opponent. This woman seemed very self-conscious of her outward appearance, with a four-hour hairdo and looking like she put her makeup on with a paintbrush. Everything on her- hair, makeup, and clothes- was absolutely perfect and glamorous. In Link's personal opinion, however, she looked more like a clown than a beautiful model woman.

She stared him down with an attempt of a vicious scowl, but it turned out looking like she was posing for an imaginary cameraman. It took everything Link had to keep himself from laughing.

She tugged lightly. "Let go," she growled, her voice sounding very similar to that of Marilyn Monroe. "It's mine."

"It is not!" Link retorted, tugging back.

"I saw it first!"

Other women began to notice them, and the two began drawing a crowd.

Link sighed, trying to be polite. "Listen, I reserved this yesterday for my girlfriend, and there was a little mistake in the clean-up department. Long story short, _I_ technically saw it first, and therefore, it's technically _mine_."

The women in the crowd slowly agreed, nodding in approval.

The glamour-puss was unmoved. "Oh, boo hoo. As you can tell, this is an exquisite item, and only one possessing such beauty as I is worthy of the dress, so it makes perfect sense for me to posses it, rather than whatever ugly poser you have as a girlfriend!"

This statement set off a spark of aggravation, and Link couldn't help but twitch. He was becoming angry.

"Now let go of it!" she demanded.

Oh, no. Link wasn't going to let her go that easily. He tried reasoning, and now he was mad. "Like hell I'll let go!" he shouted.

The women gasped, and the glamour-puss regarded him darkly.

"Now you listen to me!" Link growled dangerously, pointing a deadly finger. "I've been busting my ass, getting up at 6 'o clock in the morning to get this dress for my girlfriend! And I'm not letting anybody get in my way! I ain't afraid to hit girls, especially you! If you get in my way, I won't even resist pulling your hair, messing your makeup, or even breaking one of your 'precious' nails!! _Do I make myself absolutely clear!?_"

A hush fell over the crowd. The woman scowled, then tossed the dress at his chest.

"Fine, take it, then!" she spat. "It's ugly, anyway!"

Link propped it over his shoulder. "If that's what you thought, you should've given it to me in the first place!"

The glamour-puss huffed, turning away in disgust.

Link calmly strolled through the awestricken women to the back counter, placing to dress on top. The woman smiled at him.

"I've seen a lot of fights over clothes," she said. "But never one of that nature. But all that matters is you won, and not too many men can do that. Well done."

A small, modest applause cycled through the store, much to Link's surprise. Then it broke off, and the women went back to their shopping.

"Lemme ring this up for you," the woman took the dress and handled it with care. "So, how's she doing?"

"Managing, managing," Link responded, finally glad this mess was over with and he could relax a bit more.

"Yeah, it's kinda hard to say you're 'good' when you've got your days numbered," she said gloomily. "Here, I'll even remove the tags for you."

"That'd be great, thanks."

"Y'know," she motioned with her sisters. "If I were God, I'd get rid of all the diseases out there, starting from the top of the alphabet- AIDS, Alzheimer's…"

"Yeah, me too," Link replied truthfully, leaning on the counter casually. "And, y'know, it's enough with all the murders and wars and drunk driving…"

"Yeah, we've got enough death already." She snipped through a piece of plastic. "Oh, well, some things you just can't change…"

Link paid for the dress (finally), and the woman folded it up nicely, put it in a box and placed it in Link's arms.

"Thank again. She'll really like this," Link thanked as he began to leave.

The woman nodded. "Your very welcome. Merry Christmas!"

"Yeah, Merry Christmas!" And with that, he stepped out of the store. But then he froze on the spot, realizing a few things.

_I conversated with a complete stranger, I said "Merry Christmas" and meant it, and by Din's Fire, I yelled at a woman over a dress!_

At first, he thought he'd gone totally crazy, but then he looked at the box in his hands and remembered why he did all those things. And when he would see the look of happiness on Zelda's face when she sees her new dress, it would've all been worth it.

And there were other people to please besides her. _And if I'm gonna do that,_ he thought. _I'd better get my ass in gear!_

So he rushed around the mall, buying everything he had written in his little list. There were several times when his arms would get too full of boxes, and he had to go out to his car and unload the gifts in the back seat. Then he'd lock up the car again and rush back into the mall to get more things.

He went into nearly every store inside the mall: the Sports Center, the Kid's Clothes, the Electronics Store, the Toy Shoppe, the Book Store, the Spiritual Store, everywhere! He ran all over the place, grabbing gift after gift.

By noon, he brought out his last load and put it on the passenger's seat, for the back seat row was all filled up. Link's feet were aching and his body demanded rest, but it would have to wait until he got back at the Mansion.

He parked in the rear garage, avoiding the view of anyone else. Then, taking a few packages into his arms, he opened the back door and slinked through the hallways to his dorm, placing them in the back corner. He went back and forth, taking each gift into his room until he had emptied out the car and had everything safely in his dorm. It was a miracle that no one else was roaming the dorm halls at the time.

With that done, Link collapsed on his bed, totally exhausted. He was so tired, but glad that the hardest part of this whole thing was over.

Link had a couple minutes of rest before a soft knock rapped against his locked door.

"Link?" a soft, female voice called. "Are you in there?"

Link sat up fearfully, looking at the pile of things in the corner. He couldn't let anyone see all that!

"Uh, yeah, just a minute, Zelda!" he replied, throwing a blanket over the pile. He then rushed to the door, unlocked it, and opened it to face his girlfriend with a big, stupid grin on his face. "Hey, Zelda."

"Hello," Zelda slightly smiled, maintaining her worried look. "Where have you been all morning?"

Link sighed tiredly. "Out."

"Again?"

"Yeah," Link let her in, then flopped down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling sleepily.

"Aw…" Zelda sat down next to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. "You've been tiring yourself out! What on earth have you been doing?"

Link sighed. "I can't tell you," he said honestly.

Surprisingly, Zelda accepted this, and smiled. "Oh, I get it. Secret Santa, hmm?"

Link nodded, yawning.

"Okay, then, I won't bother you about it." She stood. "You want some lunch?"

"Sure," Link replied tiredly. "Could you go get it for me? Anything warm will do, just no eggnog."

Zelda nodded. "Be right back!" And with that, she left him alone.

Link sighed in exhaustion and rolled over, enjoying the company of his pillow. He looked over at the lump of presents hidden under a big, fluffy blanket, realizing something.

"Aw, man," he moaned to himself. "I forgot the wrapping paper!" But he was too exhausted to really care, burying his face in his pillow. "Ah, I'll do it later…" he decided lazily, enjoying his rest. The gifts were all bought, and that's what mattered.

A/N: So? Hmm? HMM??

Cortex: Very nice. (discharges his weapon, shooting glowing garland that wraps around the Christmas tree)

Crash: Awesome, Cortex!

Cortex: Hehe… That feels kinda good… :)

YAY!! Review!!!

Crash and Cortex: REVIEW!!! :D


	6. The Truth Leaks Out

A/N: Hey, guys! I'm feeling so generous, I'm giving you TWO updates!! :D

Crash and Cortex: (wearing Santa Hats) YAY!!

Onto the chappie!!

The Secretest Santa: Chapter 6: The Truth Leaks Out

That evening, Marth roamed the hallways for no apparent reason. It was dark, but that didn't scare him all that much. The Mansion had top notch security, so he wasn't worried.

That is, until he saw a shadow slip across the wall.

"Who's there!?" Marth demanded, startling the shadow, as it quickened its pace down the hall. Though he was slightly afraid, he chased the shadow down, determined to catch it. When he got close enough, he tackled the being down to the carpeted floor.

"Ouch!!" the figure cried out in a familiar voice. Marth looked closely at the dark silhouette he had pinned to the ground. The long hair and pointed ears stuck out even in the darkness.

"Link? That you?"

"Yeah!" Link sat up. "What the hell was that for!?"

"Sorry. Thought you were a burglar or something." Marth looked at him more closely. "Whatcha got there?"

Link stood and hid whatever he was carrying behind his back. "Nothing."

Marth gave him a skeptical look. "Come on, Link, I won't tell anyone."

Link sighed. "Wrapping paper."

"For what?"

"Follow me." Link led Marth wordlessly to his dorm, slowly opening the door. Curious, Marth stepped inside, and Link closed the door and flicked on the lights. Marth looked around, becoming confused. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

"So…what's up, Link?" he asked.

Link silently approached the corner with the large blanket and ripped it off.

Marth stared in shock. A big pile of toys, clothes, and other goodies sat in the corner. He looked up at Link, who looked back quietly.

"Whoa…" Marth breathed, looking at the stuff in disbelief. "Did you buy all this?"

Link nodded, slightly grinning.

"But how come?"

"I don't know," Link shrugged uncertainly, taking a gift and sitting on the bed, beginning his attempt to wrap it. Marth joined him on the bed silently. "I just thought about how Zelda wanted that dress, and how Bowser really wanted that box set… And I saw the Wish List in the lounge, and…"

"And?"

Link sighed. "…And I thought, you know, I could make them all happy if I got them the gifts they wanted… 'Cause I had all this money I saved up, and… I-I just wanted to make everyone happy." Marth looked at him expectantly with a smile. "I don't know what answer you're looking for, but that's all I can give you."

The smile didn't waiver. "You do realize that your generosity is what Christmas is all about, right?"

A little shocked, Link looked up from the present at Marth, a questioning and semi-embarrassed look on his impish face.

"It's not about greed, Link," Marth continued, chuckling. "I hate to sound sappy, but Christmas isn't about getting presents, it's about giving joy and happiness to the people around you. The whole present thing came later on."

"……Oh…" Link replied weakly, gazing down at the gift in his hands. "I-I never knew…"

"That's okay," Marth smiled, always forgiving. "A lot of people don't know it. It takes an incident kinda like yours for them to realize."

Link softly nodded. Sighing, he looked back up at Marth. "So what do I do now? I can't just give all these presents out with my kind of reputation!"

"Hey, I'd understand."

"But you're always understanding." He looked down at the present. "I have to get these out, without anyone knowing it was really me…"

Marth grinned, waiting for Link to figure it out himself. He knew the elf was smart enough to think on his own.

Sure enough, Link snapped his fingers in realization. "I got it! I could use an alias! Then no one would know it was me!"

"Very good," Marth commented. "I knew you'd figure that out soon. So, what'll be the name?"

Link placed a hand to his chin in thought, then smiled. "How about the Secretest Santa? How's that?"

Marth pondered it over. "Well, not the best use of grammar, but it's got a nice ring to it."

"Thanks," Link thanked, but paused briefly. "Uh, you won't tell anyone…will you?"

Marth smiled. "My lips are sealed."

Link smiled. "Thanks, Marth. You're a pal."

Marth nodded, looking down at the gift and chuckling. "You need some help wrapping gifts?"

Link's gaze dropped back down to the gift. The paper surrounding it was crinkled and ripped to try and fit it around the gift. He ripped. He tore off the messy paper and grinned sheepishly at Marth. "Yeah…"

Marth smiled and grabbed the wrapping paper, tape, and present labels. "Okay, let's get started then."

----------

Zelda walked quietly through the halls, banishing the dark by flicking on the lights. As she strolled on, she encountered Marth, who seemed to be in a hurry.

"Wait, Marth!" Zelda stopped him in his excited run. "I-I need to talk to you…"

Understanding, Marth faced her. "Shoot for it."

"It's about Link…" Zelda sighed, not noticing his smile. "He's been out a lot, completely exhausting himself, and I don't even know what he's doing!" She looked up at him. "…What?"

"I wouldn't worry, Zelda," said Marth, looking around cautiously. "Can you keep a secret?"

Zelda nodded, giving Marth her full attention. And with that, Marth proceeded to tell her everything he knew of Link's generous deeds and the plans he was using to give them all out. Zelda smiled in glee, not quite believing what she was hearing.

"He did all that…?" she said softly.

Marth nodded. "And the whole time he didn't even realize he was in the Christmas spirit! Even so, he's still going through with his plans."

"Aw, that's so sweet of him…"

"Yeah. I found him a half-hour ago. Since then I've been helping him wrap gifts; he can't really do it himself," he chuckled.

"So what're you doing out here?"

"Oh, I went to go get some more tape," But then he quickly changed the subject. "Listen, I've been meaning to find you and tell you…"

"Yes?" Zelda listened.

"He bought a gift for every Smasher, but he didn't get one for himself. He didn't want to feel selfish, but he really doesn't want people to know it's him. If the Smashers figure out he didn't get a gift from the Secretest Santa, they'll get suspicious."

The two looked at each other in quiet thought until Zelda nodded and smiled. "Let me handle it. I know exactly what to get him."

"Thanks, Zelda," Marth thanked. "Keep all this a secret, alright?"

Zelda nodded.

"Okay, then. Meet me in my dorm to wrap it."

"Alright." And with that, the two split up for their own dorms, confidents in their own secret little plan. Christmas day was not too far away…

A/N: Aw, yeah! This'll be done before Christmas! One more chapter!!

Cortex: Aw… I wanted to stay longer!

Crash: (patting his shoulder) That's okay… You can come the Christmas party!

Cortex: Okay!! :D

Review, people!!!


	7. Christmas Morning

A/N: Alright! Last chappie time!

Cortex: (sigh) I hope it's a long one…

Crash: (looks chappie over) It is!!

Cortex: YAY!! :D

Chappie time! :)

The Secretest Santa: Chapter 7: Christmas Morning

Christmas morning seemed to sneak up on everyone, one way or another. Nevertheless, all Smashers gathered in the lounge, where all the presents had been placed under the shining tree. Mario and Peach passed out the gifts to each anxious Smasher. They began getting confused when each Smasher began getting two presents instead of one.

Peach looked curiously at one of the labels. "'Secretest Santa?'"

"Don't worry about it," Mario said quietly. "A gift's a gift."

Once the gifts were all passed out, a frenzy of ripping paper and "oohs" and "ahhs" began. In minutes, there was a mess of wrapping paper on the floor and endless chatter started as each Smasher discovered who their Secret Santa was.

"Oh, wow, cool! Thanks, Pikachu!"

"Alright! Dude, Fox, you rock! I've always wanted this!"

"Aw, Luigi, you shouldn't have…"

Roy hastily opened his gift and gasped. "Oh, a Rage Against the Machine CD! Cool!" He looked down at Link, who sat on the floor in his pajamas, half-asleep.

Link looked up groggily at Roy. "…What?"

"…You got this for me, didn't you?"

"Well… y-yeah…"

Roy grinned. "I knew it! Open yours!"

Link dropped his gaze down to the small gift on the floor before him. Slowly, he lifted it up and ripped off the paper to reveal a burned CD labeled in thick, black marker "Link's Favorites."

"I downloaded a lot of songs you listen to on the radio but don't have on CDs," Roy explained. "The list's on the inside cover. See, there's some Beastie Boys, Modest Mouse, Sublime…"

Link glanced down the list, a grin spreading across his face. "Sweet. Thanks, Roy."

Roy's face beamed. "Merry Christmas, Link!"

Link chuckled softly. "Yeah, Merry Christmas, Roy."

Marth smiled at Link at that statement. As soon as all the Secret Santa gifts were opened and thank yous were exchanged, each Smasher began getting a little…confused by the present count.

"Huh…? Hey, here's another present!"

"'Secretest Santa?' Who's that!?"

"Who cares? It's another gift!"

Excited agreement cycled through the room as once again a frenzy of ripping paper began, but the Smashers' responses were a lot more satisfied.

"EEEE!!! What an adorable robe!! I've ALWAYS wanted this!"

"Hmm… The first four chronicles of Discworld… Sounds cool!"

"AAAAAHHHH!!!!! OH MY GOD!!! THE SPECIAL EDITION SCARY MOVIE TRILOGY ON DVD!!!!!!!!!"

Link smiled to himself as he witnessed the happy looks on their faces as they opened their gifts, especially Zelda. When she opened the box and gasped in delight at her new halter-top dress, Link sighed in satisfaction.

He had even gotten Ganondorf a gift, though he hadn't list anything on the Wish List. Link smiled as the warlock opened the box and brought out a large snow globe, mounted on a tiny, hand-carved black castle with the carving of a black dragon inside the globe. Ganondorf stared at it curiously, then shook it to have the black and red confetti float around inside the globe and shimmer. Ganondorf stared at it a little longer, then Link caught a small smile on his face, and that satisfied Link enough.

"Alright!" Roy held his new electric guitar in his hands, looking down at Link. "Hey, Link, open yours!"

Link gave him a puzzled look, then glanced down at the other present before him. Sure enough, it was labeled "To Link, form the Secretest Santa."

_Strange,_ he silently mused. _I don't remember getting myself a present…_ He soon shrugged and grabbed the gift, ripping off the paper to reveal a long, mahogany box with golden hinges. Slowly, he opened the box and looked inside, eyes wide with amazement.

There it was, his dream knife, the leaf knife, sheathed neatly in its holder. He brought it out and exposed the stainless steel leaf blade. He turned it over in his hands, looking at it in awe as it looked better than it did in the window.

"Wow, neat!" Roy commented. "That knife totally fits you! What're you gonna call it?"

Link smiled up at Roy. "Razorleaf."

"See, Link?" Marth nudged him. "I told you a Secret Santa would get it for you!"

"Man, this Secretest Santa dude ROCKS!!!" Bowser roared happily.

"Yeah!" piped up Ness, holding his new GBA SP. "I hope he comes back next year!"

The Smashers all cheered in agreement as they broke off to set aside their gifts and head out for breakfast. Link was the last to leave with two things on his mind: the satisfaction of his happy companions and the confusion of who gave him Razorleaf.

----------

Most of the Smashers were helping with the ham, potatoes, eggnog, and other food for the big Christmas dinner. But somehow, Zelda managed to slip out of the kitchen and approached a certain dorm. She opened it to see Link looking over his knife while listening on his headphones, most likely to his newest CD. As she closed the door, he brought his gaze up and turned off the CD player.

"Wow…" Link breathed. "Zelda, you look…amazing…"

She was wearing the beautiful halter-top dress, with a bit of makeup, but not too much. Link was truly amazed at how well it fit her and how good she looked in it.

Zelda smiled sweetly. "Thank you. Then again, I wouldn't have ever gotten this dress if it wasn't for you."

Link sat up, surprised. "H-how did you know…?"

"Marth told me everything." She sat on the bed beside him. "Link, this is the most gracious thing you've ever done for us all at SSBM Mansion. You spent all your time and money and spread Christmas cheer like no one else could."

Link grinned sheepishly and looked her up and down again. "So… You like that dress?"

Zelda smiled affectionately. "I absolutely love it."

"Good," Link grinned. "Cause you don't know what I went through to get you that."

Zelda giggled as she scooted closer to him.

Link dropped his gaze down at his knife. "But it's weird… I never bought this…"

"Yes," Zelda began. "Marth and I knew that as well. We knew the others would get suspicious if you hadn't gotten a gift of your own, so I knew exactly what to get you."

Link looked back up at Zelda and smiled. "Aw, Zel…" He reached over and embraced her with one arm lovingly.

After he drew away, Zelda asked, "So, do you get it now?"

It took Link a minute to think about what she meant, then he nodded. "Yeah, yeah, I do… I get it now… And here I thought it was all about greed and extravagant spending…"

"No no no, that all came when people got rich and spoiled," Zelda joked, getting him to laugh. "But no, Christmas is really about gathering together and spreading joy. That's the true spirit of Christmas, and no one could ever do it like you did."

Link smiled warmly, and they exchanged a brief, comforting silence. So, Link was proven wrong, and despite his usual resentment of being proved wrong, he felt pretty okay about it. It was worth it if it turned a gloomy time into a lot more pleasant time for him.

Zelda smiled. "Shouldn't we go help with the dinner?"

"Sure," Link agreed as they both stood and approached the door.

"So, Link," Zelda continued as they strolled down the empty hallways. "How long do you intend to have this go on for, without telling the others, that is?"

Link grinned. "As long as I can."

----------

Another year came and gone, and it was once again Christmas time at the SSBM Mansion. Once more the rooms and halls were filled to the brim with Christmas cheer and the smell of gingerbread and eggnog.

Link pushed open the door to the lounge and back into the room, making slow hand gestures as he moved. "Okay, keep going, back it in, carefully…"

Out of the doorway behind him came a large pine tree, carried by Mario, Peach, Fox, and Roy carefully as they moved towards the corner of the room.

"Almost… now!"

With care, they placed the tree down and tilted it until it stood upright. They all backed off, looking it over.

"Hey, Link, you're right!" Roy grinned. "It _does_ look better than the one last year!"

"Yeah," Fox agreed. "The leaf foliage looks healthy and the branches look stronger."

"Well, they're better when they're freshly cut."

"Yeah, it may have cost a little more, but it looks like it could withstand more ornaments," Mario added.

"Yeah, but let's not do the garland this year, it looks too tacky," Link reasoned. "Why don't we try the Christmas lights in the closet instead?"

"Hey, that's a good idea!" Peach agreed.

"I'll go get the lights, then," said Mario, approaching the door.

"I'll help."

"Me too!"

"Dibs on plugging them in!"

Link smiled in amusement as they all left to retrieve the lights. His sharp hearing then forced him to turn and look upon Luigi, who stood with his back turned to the Hylian, holding a folded-up piece of paper and shuffling cautiously in a tiny box for a pin.

"Hey, Luigi."

"WAH!!" the young plumber jumped, turning sharply and nervously to face Link. "Dang it, Link, don't DO that! I nearly pricked myself!"

"Sorry," Link apologized, dropping his gaze down to the paper in his gloved hand. "What's that?"

Luigi quickly hid it behind his back and sulked. "None of your business!"

"Hey, come on, I won't tell anyone. Promise."

Hesitantly, Luigi cleared his throat. "Well…" he began, shuffling for a pin. "You remember the Secretest Santa guy from last year?"

Link nodded. "Yeah."

"Well, I kinda… wrote him a little letter, in case, y'know, he's real after all…"

"Well, why wouldn't he be?"

Luigi froze before placing the pin firmly into the bulletin board to post up his enclosed letter. "Well… I've kinda been talking with some of the guys… They said the Secretest Santa guy is fake… that he won't come back…"

Link shook his head ruefully. It was true- there were still non-believers out there.

"Link…? Do you think he's real?" Luigi asked timidly.

The elf chuckled. "Hey, if he can get me to believe, _me_ of all people, then I think he's real enough."

Luigi's face instantly brightened. "Really?"

"Yeah, don't let those other guys push down on your Christmas spirit. I'm sure they'll get their lesson soon enough."

"Thank, Link." Luigi stepped away from the board. "Now don't you go reading it! It's for the Secretest Santa only!"

"Got it." Though it was tempting to read then and there, Link knew he would get to read it eventually.

Luigi looked at the letter posted on the board, sighing. "You really think he'll do it again this year?"

Link smiled and put an arm around his shoulder. "Yeah, I have a good feeling he will."

Luigi smiled cheerfully up at the Hylian. "Thanks a lot, Link. I'm gonna go get some eggnog, you want any?"

"Nah, I'm good."

Link patiently waited for the plumber to leave before he snatched the letter off the board, slyly slipping it into his pocket.

Yep, the Secretest Santa would come back again this year. He was sure of that.

THE END

HAPPY HOIDAYS!!!

A/N: YAY!! WE'RE ALL DONE!! (pops a Christmas cracker and confetti flies everywhere) HAPPY CHRISTMAHANUKWANZA!!(if that's how you spell it XD) Okay, guys, gather around! (the whole cast of Nintendo appears by Crash and Cortex) A-one, a-two…

All: (singing) We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!

Crash: Good tidings we bring…

Cortex: To you and your king!

All: Good tidings for Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Cortex: (slow and loud) And a Happy New YearrrRRRRRR!!! (high-pitched and shatters the windows)

Crash: (grinning) Nice.

Yay! Review, people, and Happy Holidays from all of us!!

All: (wave and cheer)


End file.
